Feeling vexed lately..

I have been feeling really vexed lately.. I don't know why..
Its a lot of things accumulating, and accumulating, but it has not erupted yet.. Thank God!!

But seriously, one of which is people kept telling me I spent too much, which of course I'm aware of it.. but when it gets just too much, you would feel like its nagging, and it gets really irritating.. if that's the case, then I would think I would not blog such stuff anymore (becos most of them will koe it only when I blogged it!).. even if I do, I will just say "I bought some stuff".. and tat's it! Period.

Then some people has been talking to me as if I'm a pest.. Just brush me off when I initiate a conversation.. do you know how irritating and angry I was (though I never show it physically)?
And some people has been really stubborn.. send reminder emails but never action.. then in the first place, why agree to it?
Don't wish to talk abt this anymore..

Then the last weekend was really hectic.. I didn't have enuf sleep.. I'm sure I got the normal 6-8 hrs of sleep, but its not enuf.. its like this terrible fatigue that I have been experiencing.. I want to sleep more, but my body's biological clock just doesn't seem to allow me to do that!

This morning, as I was in the bus (making my way to work), I'm thinking that this year, I will not initiate anything.. just let everything takes its natural course, eg: the countdown event 2009/2010.. I plan so much last yr (2008) and took the initiative to do so, but one after another cldn't make it last minute.. I totally am disappointed - I'm NOT going to do anything, and if there is someone else planning it, I will then go, but pls. don't expect me to plan anything.. I don't want to feel disappointed again..

From now on, I would do a silent retreat and take a step back, so if you see me just doing the abnormal (becos I don't believe in doing something that is against my will - no point forcing and being disappointed that efforts are not being paid off.. if I want to do, I will do it willingly and with a happy attitude), you know that I need the peace, and it will probably start very soon. In fact, it may start this weekend. A big hint already.. those who know, pls. respect my decision. For those who don't know what I'm talking, go figure!

All these factors just accumulates and if this carry on, it would soon be an outburst, which will be very ugly.. very ugly..

Okay.. I have spoken enough..
Got to just turn in for the night.. I'm really feeling tired easily these few days..

A sleepy man is an angry man,
<<< abriel >>>