I'm having mixed feelings!!

Well.. today is quite a dramatic day for me.. Let me explain myself!! I'll try to KISS (KISS= Keep It Short & Simple.. wat were u thinking!?)

Feeling: Shocked (Part I)

I've got a shock of my life when I've read this morning's (29 April 2005) edition of The Straits Times.. The man who is involved in the child-sex case in Bangkok is actually MY POLYTECHNIC LECTURER who actually taught me a subject called, "Food Preservation & Quality Assurance"! My goodness!! Why did he do this?? Haiz.. anyway, below are details which is extracted from TODAY 29 April 2005:

"Temasek Polytechnic confirms arrest of staff on sex charge
IN A press statement yesterday, Temasek Polytechnic confirmed that a member of its staff, Mr Darwis Rianto Lim, had been arrested in Bangkok for alleged involvement in a sex-related offence.
The polytechnic said the Singaporean had been suspended from his duties with immediate effect.
"As the matter is in the hands of the Thai police, the polytechnic has no further comments," it said.
According to The Straits Times, Mr Lim, 31, was arrested for trying to buy sex with underage boys over the Internet. He had allegedly posted notices on the Web offering $329 for sex with a boy aged between 12 and 16.
He was caught at a Bangkok hotel by undercover police officers, who posed as sex agents, after he was shown three boys and paid for a 16-year-old, the paper said."

Feeling: Shocked (Part II)
You will NOT believe this!! I just received in my MSN email an email from a Major in the army who is the chairman for NDP 2005 Website! I dun even koe how he manage to find my blog on the net.. I admitted tat I've gone into NDP 2005 website to look for some info for some of my blogposts regarding the GOH rehearsals, but I did NOT give any personal info to the NDP website.. Man.. the internet is such a powerful tool.. well.. for those of you who are curious wat he wrote, here it is (btw, i dun think anything in the following is confidential, so shld be all right!):

"I am MAJ Alan Teo, Chairman NDP 2005 Website. I have read your blog about the GOH rehearsals for NDP 2005 in your blog site. Good stuffs. I believe the experience you are having is one that you will remember for many years to come.
I would like to sincerly invite you to share your blood and sweat in contributing to the nation's 40th birthday by blogging in the NDP Journals at the ndp website.
The NDP Journals is a place for all participants of NDP 2005 to share their experience in this celebration. To register, just follow this link www.ndp.org.sg to sign up as iConnect member. Then send me your ID to allow me to activate your account.
We look forward to your favourable reply."

Feeling: Sad,demoralised & filled with hatred
Today we book in early in the morning (as early as before 0645 must reach camp, becos' we do marshalling duty for some big shot ppl who is coming over to my base for some meeting!).. I was standing at the spot where I was briefed yesterday.. but then, my CO (Commanding Officer - the BIGGEST shot in my squadron) came early and guess wat! He started scolding ppl for some reason or another.. and I think I was the worse when he scolded me.. you koe wat he scolded me?? He scolded me "STUPID".. becos' I was standing at this position where I'm supposed to pay attention to either one of my fellow RPs or my RSM for signal as to direct the big shots coming in the the base HQ for meeting..
Then juz nice, there is this Colonel's car coming.. its either they never tell me tat this car is coming to Base HQ or I was not paying so much attention.. so this Colonel's car came in, and me being received instructions of NOT allowing any other cars to come in and park except authorized vehicles.. so I decide to ask the Colonel as to where he is going since I supposedly did not received any instructions for this guy to turn in.. so my CO saw me ask this guy and ask me wat I ask him.. my CO reply was "why you ask him where he is going? He is definately coming here for the meeting and when u ask him like tat, he wld think you are stupid!..".. he goes on and on and kept on implying me tat i was stupid! Wat's worse is tat he told my other superiors (ie, my RSM [reginmental sergeant major], S3 [asst. CO] and OC [officer in command -head of the men] ) tat I was stupid and he told the incident to each and everyone of them! man.. tat time i was super hurt!! how can he call his men stupid??
After my CO told my RSM abt the matter, my RSM was good in a sense tat he told me properly but after a while, i was tired and my attention start to wonder.. my RSM then scolded me..
The best was my S3.. he told me nicely!! he did NOT scold me or anything like tat.. i told him the reasons and he juz said 'ok'.. he is a nice guy.. haiz.. so in NS, we got this term as "bua" when kenna scolded and stuff.. so in summary, I've been "bua" today for like almost 80% liaoz leaving me only 20% of my skin.. tat's how bad.. and this morning, whenever i pass his car, i wld feel some sort of hatred!! but when i dun see his car, i feel ok.. weird isn't it!

Feeling: Pissed off!
This morning took a cab with my friend to camp becos' have to reach camp before 0645 for the marshalling thing.. I meet my friend at 0545 to take cab.. actually, in the first place, he said 0600 to take cab so as to 'siam' the midnight 50% surcharge.. but i did not really want to take with him, becos' i scared he late and stuff.. moreover, i dun quite like him.. his character simply pisses me off! so before i left home yesterday, he asked me whether i taking cab with him.. i said "no! i take cab at 0545".. he thought for a while before saying ok.. i pick you.. (FYI: he stay abt 5-10mins away frm my hse).. i said "ok" hesitantly, thinking tat ok lah.. at least get to save some money!
Then this morning, he did all tat i ask him to do (ie, call cab and be on time etc..) but then, it was his FIRST time coming to my hse (though everytime he take bus with me and saw me stop tat bus-stop near my hse).. but he claim tat he forgot! so he msg me when he is in the cab (which i ask him to do so, so i roughly can gauge when he is coming).. i waited like 10-15mins after he send tat SMS.. then he called me said tat he lost his way.. and after much explaination frm me, he finally pick me up in abt 5mins time after he called me..
I was thinking its a normal cab.. suddenly, he came in one Prestige cab (which is a Merc cab and becos' we call, there is this $1.20 extra charge , which shld be waived off if its a normal Toyota cab according to SMRT cab rules!).. but then no choice.. he in tat cab already.. so no choice.. have to take..
Then when i reach there, its already $6.30 (excluding the $1.20 extra charge, and y $6.30, becos' he made the wrong turn to find my place and also it run by $0.15 instead of the normal $0.10 becos' of the midnight 50% surcharge)..
so i gave directions to the cab driver as to how to get to camp and by the time i reach there, the total fare (including the $1.20 charge) was $15.20.. so i counted and stuff.. which at first i miscalculated and my friend (lets juz call him 'J'- yes.. its tat SAME 'J' guy whom I've mentioned in my earlier blogposts.. tat guy who pisses me off.. dun remember?? nvm!..) make noise.. so by right, i shld have pay him $6.20 (after splitting the $2.40 boarding fee and $1.20 extra charge).. but 'J' insist tat I split cost with him the $6.30 becos' he needs to go my place.. but my stand was tat becos' its his problem who lost his way in finding my place and make one big round.. i also told him tat its NOT fair for me to split the full cost with him as its his fault and not mine.. btw, when i ask him yesterday whether he koe, he said "yes" after so much explanation frm me..
And then he insisted on his stand tat i shld pay.. in order to make him shut up, i decide to pay him and ask him how much he want.. in the end, i paid $7.50 instead of the by right charge of $6.20..
I now koe tat i will insist NOT to take cab with him anymore.. i shld have make my stand and not take cab with him this morning.. i shld have juz spend $12 (if i take cab alone to camp, this is how much i have to pay!) to escape all these crap frm him.. the reason y i decide to leave at 0545 instead of the 0600 is like to "shake" him off, so tat i'll have the whole cab to myself! argghh..
worse still, he behind my back complain to one of my friends which my friend accidentally leak out while i take cab with him in the evening on the way back, becos' he was like a bit calculative.. no choice lah.. take cab with ppl is like tat one.. but frankly speaking, i was also guilty in telling this cab incident abt 'J' to one of my friends too, but i koe he wont tell ppl becos' he is those can keep secrets one.. so ya.. arrggghhh.. this 'J' guy juz keep stepping on my toes!

Feeling: Happy (Part I)
This involves my Christian walk!! For mths, since I in NS, I have been missing out a lot on my spritual life.. as in never do Quiet Time, go church, etc.. so I have been down a lot!
But today at cell, I'm glad I attended it!! one of my church elder (we call him uncle weng seng) came to my hse and be a guest host for the cell group.. frankly speaking, the things he talk is a bit boring.. almost felt like sleeping *oops*.. but then the ministry time (ie, he went round praying for everyone) after it is good.. He said a lot of encouraging stuff to me.. but one of which i remembered clearly.. he said "remember tat as you put on your army uniform, you are putting on the armour of God and He will guide you in your paths as long as you say yes!".. wow.. tat moment I was encouraged.. becos' I've been waiting for a sign.. becos' i was about to give up on my spritual walk.. so only after today, I koe tat God has always been guiding me and NOT given up on me, so i shld NOT give up on myself! =) Praise the LORD!

Feeling: Happy (Part II)
The sergeants tried to plead with my PC (Platoon Commander who is my officer by the way) to book in tml morning.. but they failed.. so all of us, as privates, when to look for my PC but he has got some function to attend.. so one of us called my PC and Praise the LORD tat my PC allowed us to come tml morning instead of booking in 2359 tonite! so yupz! =)

ooppss.. i think i talk too much and have taken too much of ur time.. but guess wat!! you've got a LOOONNNGG weekend (with being Sun is S'pore Labour day and the following day which is a monday is a declared public holiday), while me have to do duty tml (sat) and mon.. haiz.. so no excuse for you not to read! ha

ok lah.. me gotta sleep liaoz.. i got to wake up like 5.30am the next morning.. its like 12.24am now.. but y i can 'tong' so long is becos' i slept in the afternoon in camp for like 3hrs.. ha..

ok lah.. really gtg liaoz..

Ciaoz n have a GREAT weekend ahead,
<<< abriel >>>